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Doubt anyone is still reading now tbh
I can say anything
I can air my grievances
Bore you about my latest power tool purchase
Which was an electric planer, btw
Really takes the pain out of planing
Once you get the hang of it
Remember to keep the pressure even
Otherwise it’ll leave a dent at the end
And have to keep going over it
...
Did you catch the game last night by the way?
Don’t know how those pundits get away with it
Paid a fortune to spout that rubbish
Saying that, I do like Garth Crooks
Real passion for the game, speaks his mind
Gets a lot of flack, does Garth
Which is out of order really
Would choose him over Chris Sutton any day
Now he is the personification of beige
There’s just nothing there, is there?
Bit like Tim Henman used to be
We tried to dress it up with Henman Hill etc
But he was just a bit rubbish
And literally didn’t have an ounce of personality
I mean Andy Murray isn’t exactly an extrovert
But you begrudgingly respect his grumpiness
At least it’s something
He’s living
He’s present
Not just bobbing along all year under the radar
Only to lose the semi final at Wimbledon again
Must be really demoralising, that
“Always the bridesmaid never the bride”
That type of thing
There’s load of people like that though
Stephen Merchant was one
But he’s played the long game
Everyone loves him now
Genuinely funny on his own
Whereas it’s all over for Gervais
America’s ruined him
Game over